Defining Silence

Silence is in fact a sound. Or rather it is the definitive lack of sound but it is a sound none the less. BUT can silence every truly be silent or is the name itself the contradiction. If I provide no outlet for my thought and I am "silent" by definition what is to come of my thoughts? Does their worth become less? Or by suffocation do they shrink with discouragement and despair? Do they lose life? Is the island of misfits and lost dreams a fantasy land or is there perhaps some truth to the idea of forgotten dreams?! Sometimes the world steps in and "reality" decides to show its face. What is to become of the thoughts and dreams that are stolen by the "realists" of this life.
Sometimes my real voice screams so loud my thoughts become all consumed. Suffocation seems to set in and I can't breathe. What is to become of me in that moment?! Can I call time out?! If I actually STOP and take a breath will the world miss a turn or hit a bump? Will the sun still shine, will food be run, will groceries still get done?! We as humans, so often times fixate on the idea of gains and losses. What was the OVERALL outcome?! Did I fall behind or come out ahead?! What is end of my story? How many times have we wished that?! How many times do we pray and ask to know the outcome?
Have you ever read the ending of a book first?! One time I cheated, it was only once, but it was the worst most confusing moment of my life. There was a new fear present.  What if somehow by "knowing" the ending I mess it up.  What if in knowing the end I begin to force the path based on my current understanding and I miss the end or some how alter it. Is life really so finicky? Would knowing such a detail be a form of motivation? I mean now you have "sight". You have a concrete idea of what your working towards. It becomes an idea of works. I am working toward this because I know this—insert example/situation here.
Another thought perhaps... does knowing the end devalue the results? Is it not the journey that is often times most beautiful. We value what we work for. As just a general idea in society when some one uses their own money to buy something or invest in something there is typically more value. What if it causes us to stagnate?! On the flip side motivation ... What if knowing the outcome causes us to give up instead? Could seeing the end be so overwhelming that we just give up in frustration because we try to manipulate out of our emotion rather than truth!